“I’m just checking in.” = Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?
“Sorry to bother you again.” = Why can’t you do your fucking job?
“I feel bad for making you do this.” = You should feel bad for not having done this already.
“This was helpful.” = This would’ve been helpful two weeks ago.
“Sorry if I somehow missed your email.” = We both know you never emailed me.
“Thanks for the explanation.” = If you had told me this last week, you would’ve saved me a lot of time.
“Perhaps there was a misunderstanding.” = You didn’t fucking listen to me.
More at McSweeneys. Hat tip to John Thorne.
20 Responses
“Let me translate my emails for you” https://t.co/A7FBB5XQX6
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
look forward to ur reply = BOTHER replying when you read this! “Let me translate my emails for you” https://t.co/TGZviJE5QV
“Let me translate my emails for you”: “I’m just checking in.” = Where is that thing you promised I’d have by n… https://t.co/gnw08hBwLT
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
RT @fp2p: Handy email translation service. e.g. “I’m just checking in.” = Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now? https://t.co/FL…
Handy email translation service. e.g. “I’m just checking in.” = Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now? https://t.co/FL6vI4EJsH
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
“Sorry to bother you again.” = Why can’t you do your fucking job? https://t.co/bKcwHhLHky
@cblatts oh this is oh so timely in my life right now. everything is spot on.
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
@cblatts Your students must be terrified of emailing you.
https://t.co/39zteIUbaQ
Haha – this is great! @cblatts “Look forward to your response.” = Hurry up and email me back.
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
RT @cblatts: “I’m just checking in.” = “Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?” (& other emails translated) https://t.co/alWzIz2…
“Let me translate my emails for you” https://t.co/wlu39UGs4z